Friday, September 17, 2010

Dear Truth Blog,
I miss you so much. I used to love coming here and throwing it all down on the page not worrying about who would see it or why.

A lot has changed since I have been here but a lot also has not. I want to say that I haven't sold out but I think I have a little. I want to say that I'm a better man but I'm not so sure it's true. I want to say that it's all making more sense than it used to but the reality is that it's all still so damn unclear.

I've managed to surround myself with the kind of people who think in a completely different way. They relish numbers and results. They live for success and accomplishment. I suppressed everything that made this little page great and made me smile every time I stared down the emptiness of the white box waiting to be filled with my words. And I feel hopelessly lost when the world doesn't revolve around ideas and emotions.

There is some good news. I think that my dreams are still intact. I think that there are pieces inside me still moving in the right direction. I think that despite- or in spite- of all of it, we'll still be OK. The goal might not be clear but the hunger is there.

I would hate to say it and have it not be true but I think that I am back. I'm ready to start asking the big questions again and swinging for the fences with some big answers.

So there. Take that.



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