Sunday, January 22, 2006

When it comes to hearts I've never shopped to own. To be clear, I'm not saying I've never loved. But I've certainly never loved completely. In love and in life I've rented to fit my current situation, my lifestyle, my budget, my inclinations. I take a small bedroom in a big house because it's all I can afford and it's all I need. I'll take a small room in your heart too. I'm a left atrium kind of guy. Make me a comfy little nook and I'll settle in, insulate the walls, curl up under my down comforter and make a little home.

The problem with renting is you never learn what it means to be the owner. You never learn what it means to pay the bills and make repairs and get to know the neighbors. At the end of it all it's the owners who can kick me out anytime they like. The ventricles are the prime real estate. They do most of the work and they pull most of the weight. So tonight my ass is out on the cold pavement of the street again. But I don't have any plans to make these empty streets my home. I won't let it happen every night. I won't wake up with a heartache wondering why I spent the night in a Motel 6.

Someday. Someday I'll meet you when I'm sleeping. There won't be a security deposit. I won't want to rent-to-own. I'll open my suitcases right in your living room and you'll realize that I've come to stay. That I'm making every room in your house my home.

Someday that's where it will end. But today is not that day.


Blogger Yossarian said...


5:31 PM  

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