Tuesday, April 12, 2005


The thing is, when a bullet is coming for you, the bang isn't the only thing you hear. At least not when it misses. The motherfucker buzzes. It whizzes. All the CO2 molecules bunch up in front of it and then it pushes them aside like the red felt curtain at the movie theater. I don't care how bad you think you are, the first time you hear the bullet buzzing past you you're scared as hell. If it doesn't buzz... well... lets just hope it's buzzing.

Once. I've heard it once. About 8 years ago. I even have a reminder. a small racing-stripe scar on the outside of my right elbow. I don't want to hear that again. Most of me doesn't at least. But a little tiny voice whispers, maybe someday. There is something at least a little bit thrilling about the whole ordeal. It's really easy to forget how damn fragile and inconsiquential every single one of us is when we spend our days staring at screens that lead to us to worlds which can't hurt us. Worlds that can't even touch us. I wonder if the old classic writers would love blogs or spit on them. If Hemmingway knew I was young and I spent so many days sitting here staring at a screen he would probably laugh at me. He'd probably think back to the time he spent slipping through enemy fire. The time he spent saving lives and the time he spent recovering in a hospital staring at the plain white cieling.

And he'd see me sitting here with this smirk on my face and 5 browser windows open and some sucky music streaming off the internet. I'll bet he would sit down, cross his legs, tug at that grey beard and all the while be stewing inside over how much he wants to sock me a good one to the left temple. Cuz some little shit like me can sit here and be so invincible to a world that's gone crazy.

I'll get up. I'll get out. I know what the bullet sounds like. I know the world isn't all Oakleys and ipods and google searches. It's not all pretty girls and V-6s and starched collars. And I hear the bang without the buzz. that's OK. I'll take it. I know what I'm getting myself into.



Blogger Pragmatik said...

Dude, you have to tell that story. Hemingway would want to read it.
Then we'll all get drunk.

8:01 PM  
Blogger dbhayes said...

Effing A, Cotton. Effing A.

9:07 PM  
Blogger Mo said...

dude youve been shot at? i used to think you were just gangster, but thats some 50 cent gangsta shit right there.

i would like to hear that story too.

11:28 AM  
Blogger simpleton said...

This is a good one. I bet the full bullet story would be even better.

7:29 AM  
Blogger James said...

Really good writing.

I love Hemingway.

12:20 AM  

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