Wednesday, October 27, 2004

Sometimes I wonder if my Dockers Stain defender shirt is giving me cancer. It is, after all, coated with teflon, a known carcinogen. It's true, I haven't been around. I could say it's because I haven't had time and I wouldn't be lying but I also wouldn't be telling the whole truth. The whole truth is that I've lost my kick. The point of college is to grind you down. It's to pound you into submission to that 60 hour work week that's gonna be dumped on you when you go out there in the workplace and take on a real job.

I hate the journalism school. It sucks the life out of my writing. I don't want to write obituaries or sports columns or sidebars. I don't want deadlines or interviews or inverted pyramids. But what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Doesn't it? Does it?

I don't have it. I don't have the passion. I don't have the fire right now. I'm empty. I'm completely empty. I'm going to school and I got a girl and I work in a sorority house and I am totally empty. And not the kind of empty that I want to sit down and write you about. It's the kind that I don't want to think about. And I'm trying to change. I'm trying to get the passion back. I'm trying to grab hold of something. Anything. When I get a grip, when I find a ledge or a branch or a hand, I'll pull myself up on top, I'll crawl across the floor, I'll lift myself into my desk chair and I'll write to you again. Because when I have passion there's nothing I'd rather do than spread the love and share it with you.

The comeback kid comes back. He always does. He has to.

2 Comments:

Blogger D Rant Master said...

We'll be around..

7:59 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

stop feeling sorry for yourself schoolboy.

9:02 PM  

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